Powered by glolg
Display Preferences Most Recent Entries Chatterbox Blog Links Site Statistics Category Tags About Me, Myself and Gilbert XML RSS Feed
Saturday, Apr 26, 2014 - 22:29 SGT
Posted By: Gilbert

Gone Astray


Ham V Out

It was with great sadness that I found the fifth Mr. Ham motionless in the corner of his residence on Monday. His predecessor assured me that Mr. Ham V was in good hands, having been taken on as an apprentice with H.L. Ham. Not wholly convinced, I sat in on his tutoring.

Mr. Ham: I hope you've picked up a thing or two from me over the past week. I shall now evaluate your competence with regards to financial analysis. Are you prepared?

Mr. Ham V: I guess so.

Mr. Ham: Here goes. You have been placed in charge of US$500000 in the current interest rate environment. Your client is in his forties, with a medium risk profile, and expects to be able to rely solely upon this capital for his retirement expenses, if need be. You have full discretion over the investment vehicles used, but have also been offered several options by colleagues.

One is to engage in high frequency trading, which is claimed to offer a relatively thin but stable margin of point-five basis points per transaction, assuming no additional competitors. Another department wants you to hold in the event that China gets margin called. Of course, you could ignore both requests and design your own portfolio. What do you do?

Mr. Ham V: I don't know, this is complicated...

Mr. Ham: *patiently* Think of it this way - what would I do?

Mr. Ham V: Tell Mr. Robo to settle it, and go for a tea break.

Mr. Ham: Fabulous! Absolutely right!

*mutual high-five-fistbump-butt-shake*

...somehow, I think he'll do well.


Moyes Out

"I've found myself helping around the house in the last hour. I've been offering to tidy the shed up, cutting the grass and asking anyone if they want a cuppa. I'm so happy right now."
- Redcafe Forums


So, it ended in tears - Moyes has been sacked, after failing to meet any reasonable expectations (i.e. a top-four finish, given they have never wound up lower than third in Premier League history), or at least putting out some attractive footie. As can be inferred from the quote above (and others), the supporters generally aren't too dismayed, even as Sir Alex Ferguson was miffed - but given that "we're both Scots" appeared to have been the driving force behind the signing in the first place (coupled with some other constraints), even the great man himself can't really claim it was unwarranted.


This about sums it up
(Source: BBC Sport)


Then again, Moyes didn't help himself with his ample collection of defeatist quips:

"I think it's the hardest start for 20 years
that Manchester United have had."
(what are the chances of that?)

"...it would be difficult for Sir Alex as well"
(despite Sir Alex winning the league last season)

"I don't know what we have to do to win"
(slightly troubling, given that that's his job description)

"(Liverpool)... come here as favourites (!)"
(0-3 at home sounds about right after that)

Having said that, much online sentiment is in agreement that he's a good guy - hardworking, has integrity, and all that. Problem was, as discussed over (very) skinny pizza with some old classmates on Thursday night, his methods simply weren't suited to his new club (see Live Life United's in-depth take). Raw endurance drills? What did he expect United to be, Everton-like grafters? And how much more one-dimensional could the tactics get, with eighty-two crosses recorded in a single game, for zero conversions? One can scarcely blame the players for rebelling afterwards.

Our consensus was that United now need a boatload of new players, given who's leaving - Vidic, Anderson, Ferdinand (likely), Evra (likely) and Nani (maybe). Anyway, that's all in the past, as the Class of 92 have taken charge - as perhaps it should have been all along? Well, the next manager should have far less pressure to contend with...


The sad face says it all



Lunching Out

Spotted a slightly-familiar spot from Obama's Tokyo visit, the highlight of which was the signal of intent over the Senkaku/Diaoyudao territorial dispute. Given that "help" amounted to some crates of America's best combat rations in the recent Ukrainian conflict, however, the Japanese shift towards militarism might be logical (if still regrettable)


Signing Out

Given that I should really be looking to graduate someday...


GUTSU! GUTSU!
...Also, stepping back to regroup can be a good strategy




comments (0) - email - share - print - direct link
trackbacks (1) - trackback url


Next: Unabashed Bullet Point Edition


Related Posts:
Fergie Fergie Sign Him Up
Sticking To The Script
Yo Bro
Hard Ham Truths
Learning The Hard Way
Back to top




1 trackback

Trackback by Is Enchant Him a Scam
Is Enchant Him a Scam - [bert's blog]


May 20, 2014 - 10:06 SGT     

Copyright © 2006-2025 GLYS. All Rights Reserved.