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Not a very productive weekend. Caught the latest instalment of The Hobbit at Lido as there were free tickets available to staff, and arrived fairly late, so I had the front row all to myself. Neck-craning aside, it was good to get some space. Synopsis: Small waterfront city welcomes foreigners only due to naked greed, over sincere well-reasoned advice from longtime citizens, and wind up getting pillaged by a marauding and even more avaricious dragon. Nothing we haven't heard.  ...Gold, you say? Then I say welcome, my friends, welcome! (Source: themarysue.com) Other than the miracle of none of the dwarves getting fried, and Sauron not just offing Gandalf when he had him at his mercy, the biggest eyebrow-raiser was the producers inventing an action girl to prevent the film from being a complete sausage fest. Ok, I'm not one to bellyache about perky redheads jumping around, and Tolkien did mention Silvan elves - but an elf-dwarf romance? That's going against canon simply to oblige modern-day moviegoers. Had a short stroll through the newly-opened Bedok Mall (which to me resembles just about every other recent mall) on Saturday morning, before heading on over to East Coast with my siblings, to try our hand at prawning. The lady proprietor adjusted the length of the lines for us, and handed us small saucers of chopped chicken liver as bait. It took about half an hour before my brother opened the scoring with the first catch, while I had the bait picked off a couple of times (sneaky buggers), before I got what looked like an antennae the third time round. Well played, Mr. Prawn. It was only in the last hour that I got my two catches. The first was missing a pincer and had evidently just moulted, according to a friendly veteran, but the second was the epitome of prawnhood - large, fully symmetrical, full of fight. It was a chore even getting it into the cage, given how it kept stubbornly grabbing onto the netting.  Left: First catch Right: Defiantly giving the middle pincer The hooking part is actually not too complicated - if a prawn has taken the bait, the float will sink beneath the surface, and on both my successful attempts, it was merely a matter of pulling them out, despite all the advice on technique that I have seen. The main part of skill appears to be getting them to bite in the first place, and my luck only changed when I began casting near the aeration openings in the centre. The staff will release extras every hour or so while blowing a whistle, to assure customers that there is quarry in the pool. Final take was nine for my brother, two for me and one for my sister, which comes to S$7.50 per head. There could have been three more had I accepted the catch that a group of girls offered, but refused as it wasn't the point. That didn't save their captives in the end, however, as an uncle took them off their hands. Tough luck, boys. Thinking back, I have declined in a way from my younger days. I remember being an enthusiastic wannabe-angler back in primary school, only to have developed a slight (and completely hypocritical, given that I am not vegetarian) unease in watching prawns struggle on the line - thinking only complicates matters. I suppose I could get used to it if need be - one of humanity's most defining attributes is the ability to justify anything, if done out of necessity.  And they were all delicious Played a few hands of the expanded Monopoly Millionaire Deal after that. Unlike the original, the winning condition is to amass one million dollars, instead of three property sets. Choosing To Be Happy Since the entire globe has been blanketed with the news of Nelson Mandela's passing and recaps of his deeds, I thought it superfluous to comment further... until I came across our government's eulogy for the man, which didn't go down well. Recall - Mandela is remembered primarily for his opposition to apartheid (lit. apart-hood), which is essentially residential segregation, and makes the above statement slightly awkward, given that his relevant minister had suggested moving foreign workers offshore in April; or: they can do our dirty work for us, but heaven forbid they live among us! Then again, this is from the same bright fellow that proposed shafting old folks to Johore once they have outlived their usefulness, so at least he is being consistent in his approach. No, this is not a facetious comparism. It all smells of spatiotemporal kicking of the can, as is the verdict of a former Permanent Secretary. Not only are policies designed to postpone problems from the present to the future, they are also trying to shift them from one place to another! Alright, so we don't want a repeat so soon - solution: ban all private buses to and alcohol in Little India. Why? Because it was a bus that knocked the unlucky worker down, and some of the workers might have been drinking? But... it worked! No new riot this week! Yay! Permanent underclass? So what? None of the signs are good. The Committee of Inquiry is due to give their conclusions in six months, but from all the cues that are being given by our very hardworking and qualified ministers, they don't have to hurry to present their findings, because nobody's waiting for what they have to say: The Prime Minister and Minister for Law already know that the workers are happy, because there is no evidence that they are unhappy, since only premeditated, islandwide acts occur when there are festering grievances.  Just imagine if they really *were* unhappy... (Original source: hometeam.sg) The Minister for Transport knows that it is just a matter of too much drinking and not enough police. The Minister for Manpower (Acting) knows that hiring will continue unabated, and his boss knows that more dormitories will be built. The Second Minister for Home Affairs knows that a continued inflow of foreign workers can be achieved, there is no social tension, and that it will all work as long as there is no xenophobia. And anyway, citizens are more criminal than them - certainly lousier at overturning police cars. What is there left to investigate? Well, there are a few silver linings: a former NMP has at least made the connection between the riot and overcrowding, probably made possible only due to the "former" designation. Next, riots may simply be the "new normal", and in fact policemen were set upon by hundreds in Geylang several years ago, but those isolated incidents don't count; moreover, The State's Times will gladly tiptoe around such incidents as long as nobody posts the videos online. And if the worst happens, we can just stay calm and have a Fish & Co! Something in me desperately hopes that all this is merely a very cunning plan to make a complete about-face just before the next general elections. I fear, however, that things are really what they look like, after jaw-droppers such as the ban on online gambling "to protect citizens from addiction" being followed within the fortnight by the news that Singapore Pools will be expanding online gambling operations, as predicted. How much money does this government actually need? Aren't our long-accumulated reserves bursting at the seams? Word Of H.L. Ham Mr. Ham: Ah, now, there you are. And would you like to subscribe to my investment newsletter, sir? Me: Depends. What's it about? Mr. Ham: It's an in-depth look at Bitcoin, which considers it as a store of value and medium of exchange, and identifies the cryptocurrency market as "winner takes all". It also calculates the Bitcoin market cap by comparism with gold and related industries. This is all in accord with what the Bank of America says in its December 5 report, which only serves to illustrate the analytical muscle underpinning the firm of H.L. Ham. Me: Didn't I say no more Bitcoin discussion... and waitamin, aren't all these points mostly what was argued here on December 1? Mr. Ham: Is that right. Me: Since we're already on this, I might as well mention that J.P. Morgan has just patented [Errata 17th December: tried to patent - well, it was worth a go] what looks like a Bitcoin clone. Figures, if anybody was going to dive in, it was likely to be the inventors of VaR etc. In a way, I can't help but admire J.P. Morgan's initiative in making bank - I do like money as much as the next guy. And they're a company, not a country. Profit-seeking is what they are supposed to do. And scanning the Bank of America report, after they plugged in their own set of top-down numbers, it seems like they have settled on US$1300 as the maximum eventual market cap, from the fundamentals. While I have cashed out at slightly less than US$1250, which was the target mentioned, I disagree with this. In my opinion, BoA are overemphasizing Bitcoin's utility as a medium of exchange, and underestimating it as a store of value. In short, Bitcoin's growth prospects are overblown in the short term, but rosy in the long term. Mr. Ham: And what a coincidence, this is exactly how this hastily stapled-on addendum to my newsletter reads too! Me: ...I have nothing to add. Mr. Ham: I suppose that will do for the next editi... I mean, it was a nice chat and all. Me: But why are you bothering with this sideline, given all the seed money you've extracted from Mr. Robo? Wait, tell me you didn't plunge in when the bubble was at its peak. Mr. Ham: We regret that H.L. Ham and Partners is strictly forbidden from releasing details on client portfolios. Me: Never mind. Mr. Ham: I am however allowed to reveal that H.L. Ham has been active in the community, like when we sponsored Christmas outreach, under the Ham branding, of course. And, not only that, we have started a literacy programme for hamsters, beginning with the new Mr. Ham and Mr. Fish. Me: Finally you're doing some good. So, what titles are you supplying? Mr. Ham: I started with the Diary of Edward the Hamster, after I got an anonymous head-up on this autobiography. Me: What? No! Crap! That's nihilistic existentialism! They won't be able to handle it yet! Better make sure they're alright...  ...Too late Next: It Cannot Be
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