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Wednesday, Nov 06, 2019 - 21:28 SGT
Posted By: Gilbert

Man Battlestations!

No, not in DotA Underlords (but just a hint, the 6 Assassins build's been the most consistent against the A.I. in racking up overall wins and XP in Proto Pass mode, with the Warriors alliance in a somewhat distant second - splashing the frenemy duo of Tidehunter & Kunkka plus Medusa fits almost any configuration later on, seeing as how this activates the Scaled alliance for +30% magic resistance, and also more or less the Warriors alliance, for a minimum of +10 armor... and this is before the insane all-around Area of Effect control)

Combat has been enjoined. Amidst loud whooping, prospective Democratic presidental candidate Elizabeth Warren has signalled the start of the Second Great Meme War, with the proposed formation of an official "Meme Team". Only one teeny problem with that - the left can't meme (fittingly, itself a meme)

Example of effective meme presented as an academic case study
[N.B. Kudos to BitChute for preserving free speech]
[N.N.B. Hosted non-embeddable (but probably smoother) version]

We have encountered this cringe with Hillary falling flat on her face with her "Pokémon GO to the Polls" failure in the last elections, in which she attempted to harness the highest-grossing franchise ever (and still going strong, mind) at the height of its popularity, to general ridicule. On the face of it, it was a no-brainer - cute worldwide phenomenon that no-one had much against, sorta-wittily combined into a "get out and vote" message. But sadly for establishment squares, memes don't work like that. Successful memes aren't sequential or linear mashups of desired properties, they can't be assembled or forced into the public consciousness on demand, as Regina comprehends when she says "stop trying to make fetch happen" in the Mean Girls movie. Think back to the all-time classics: Harambe, hamsterdance, LOLcats, distracted boyfriend, etc. They weren't made. They just were (like covfefe).

True memes, then, possess a certain je ne sais quoi, an ineffable quality present in their conception, of speaking for the times. Admittedly, despite that, there are some characteristics that many of the greats share:

  • Idiosyncratic - consider this recent gem:

    The cat's face says it all. How did this happen? How did Taylor Armstrong Crying and Pointing get paired with Confused Cat at Dinner? Heck if it knows. That didn't stop it from taking the Internet by storm and spawning countless spinoffs, though.

  • Unpretentious - we've seen an upset lady and a pointy-eared cat, a green good feelin' frog, a gorilla, snippets from lesser-known retro flicks, near-forgotten hit songs and countless hasty sketches, all make it huge. You don't hire a production team for this. You can't buy cool. Which is, it appears, what semi-establishment politicians like Warren are trying.

  • True - or, at any rate, they don't shy from being potentially offensive. Hate the distracted boyfriend meme for bringing up painful memories? Lulz, too bad, no care. Taylor Armstrong in Woman Yelling At Cat above was crying due to being falsely accused as a liar in Beverly Hills Housewives, and thus liking the meme supports spousal abusers? Who gives a shit. Veggies bad for cats, promotes bad feeding habits? Gimme a break.

    Memes, as an anonymous medium, allow readers to catch a break from the hostile, vindictive politically-correct world. As with much excellent comedy in general, they allow the clever espousal of views that most people would recognize to be probably true, yet unsayable in normal contexts. The more true yet the more unsayable, the danker the meme. This is a big problem for the modern woke left, because as a 4chan anon so candidly puts it, "their worldview is so retarded it requires paragraphs of text to set up the fictional reality they operate in before you can even start making a joke".

    Take, for instance, the celebrated case of "I sent my 12 year old son to school in a dress to combat gender stereotypes, and now he doesn't want to go to school anymore. What should I do?" It's one thing if he's a total Chad to start with, and another if he's an average less-confident lad, and right-thinkers would immediately figure that this is a very bad idea. The modern left, however, would lay the blame on his classmates and the school for non-acceptance, through contrived mental gymnastics. This is the kind of disingenuity that savage memes slice through, making them unsuited to the left.

  • Positive - note that there is no contradiction with possibly being offensive, here. A salient example would be the Trumpsman action parody above, and Kathy Griffin's tasteless decapitation of the same. Clearly, a top comedian can have the audience rolling in stitches with a joke, while another fellow might have them sitting stone-faced with the same quip. It's all in the delivery.

    Let's go back to Trumpsman, ironically slammed by Griffin herself. First off, the source material was exceedingly well-received when it hit the big screens five years ago, because what's a spy thriller without some stylish gun-fu? In that movie, secret agent Harry Hart (whose face was shopped over in the meme edit) was an unapologetic patriot willing to employ all sorts of dirty means in defense of his people, while enjoying the finer things in life, and refusing to doff his exquisitely well-tailored suits. In other words, he's basically TRUMP (Sanders would be ridiculous shoehorned into this meme, for example). Furthermore, his assaults were directed in self-defence towards hostile entities (i.e. the FAKE NEWS MEDIA, which has just been exposed to have covered Epstein leads up), which is also entirely true in real life.

    Now, contrast this with Kathy Griffin's ill-thought stunt. What is the first image that it reminds you of? That's right, terrorist beheading videos. The stern, humourless expression only compounds the unlikeability, completely unlike the Trumpsman having fun while showing off his martial prowess - which isn't actually any worse than that dished out in all those family-friendly Marvel comic movies. Ergo, while both embody lethal violence, Griffin's presentation was simply sad, angry and wholly negative, like Antifa and the whole leftist scene. Trumpsman is instead a high-energy hoot - like THE MAN himself.

All these traits considered, then, should make it obvious why The Establishment and The Modern Left are so crap at memery. The neo-elite on both aisles are simply out of it (look at how Hillary thought that "Dangerous Don" was some insult, and as for Jeb!, just look at him), while the far-left fruitcakes dominating the Democrat discourse can barely string a coherent sentence together nowadays, without having to apologize for some perceived offence or assumption as in some Red Guards self-criticism session, lest they be "called-out" and devoured by their own; even Obama has warned of the dangers of "woke culture", but it's probably too late for them. This cultural handicap is entirely antithetical to the production of TOP KEK.

Compare this to the organic grassroots support for the GOD-EMPEROR, from the denizens of 4chan, the_donald and other nexuses of unbounded creativity; they were not paid. They were not enticed. To them, the meme was life itself. They were born to the meme, moulded by it. And Warren and company imagine that they can just form a comparable unit of weaponized autists, on demand? No matter; the foe has called, and the shitlords will answer. Let the dank memes block out the sun!

Nothing holding them back - leave, leave, leave!

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