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Friday, Sep 04, 2026 - 18:37 SGT
Posted By: Gilbert

I For An I

(or: Every Person For Pronoun-self)


The Straits Trumps Times missed a yawning opportunity here
(Source: straitstimes.com)


The GOD-EMPEROR TRUMP has been diligently working on his in-game entertainment as mentioned recently, with his latest stand-up (ok, usually sit-down) comedy routine including the (foreshadowed) proposal to rename the Strait of Hormuz after himself. While this brought recriminations from those not in on the joke, such as Carney and Sanders, the more important critique might be on the lack of originality - but then again, coming up with new material is hardly an easy job even for one as talented as TRUMP, as the writers' guild might attest to, especially with all those weeks of dead air to fill before Team Red rivals - and some "allies" - get squeezed, just as planned.

On this, our Prime Minister may well be in the know too, as he performed The Beatles' Let It Be on the guitar with the Thai premier taking the vocals, at their retreat in Bangkok - certainly a fitting counterpoint to Nevermind. Whether the sentiment in the lyrics will be acknowledged by the Emperors of the East and West may be another matter, with Team Blue European Union officially signing on to the Holy Caesar's Operation Economic Outcast against Iran. Amerika's strategic energy gambit looks to be on, with close Imperial ally Argentina bringing oil into their Falkland Islands claim, alongside South Korea reportedly on the brink of contributing military assets to the Iran War Ploy.

All this had of course been covered back in May, when it was suggested that getting Amercian "allies" to shed some blood as a form of "head tax", was at least a secondary objective for the ongoing Hormuz affair. Assuredly, selling a joint military offensive in partnership with Imperial Amerika will hardly be easy, especially for their coddled and snooty European cousins, but one supposes that oil reserves actually running dry may prove to be an exceedingly persuasive argument. Going from the vibes, the American God of War is simply getting tired of holier-than-thou "partners" eye-powering as the U.S. enacts at least partly mutually-beneficial enforcement actions, and it appears to be coming to: if one wants a chicken in the pot, they had better be ready to help wring a few necks themselves.



For the non-vegetarians, it's okay if somebody else does the killing (and clean-up, and packaging) on your behalf then?
(Source: mangatown.com)


That said, it might still be a little more reassuring had Bessent not openly blamed Ukraine for attacking Russian oil refineries and thus contributing to rising oil prices - which does leave Amerika with the cleaner hands for once. With his popularity apparently waning, Zelensky has been reduced to publicizing the blowing up of a Coca-Cola production plant in Kyiv in an effort to regain American support, but that is perhaps only a fate to be expected for proxy participants in The Greatest Game; the wrangle over redirecting frozen Russian funds to Ukraine remains deadlocked within the European Union too, likely because they know well what Game is being played here.

Quickly reviewing the fast-changing Game state, Putin has put his own spin on the right to bear harms, as he used the analogy of orcas (a.k.a. killer whales) dismembering (polar) bears in explaining current geopolitics to students, in an only-too-obvious reference to Team Blue naval power. Over in the Middle Eastern theatre, Netanyahu has confirmed that Israel is working towards overthrowing the Iranian regime - so zero change there - even as Iran's top negotiator has taken to calling the United States just "Satan", downgraded from "Great Satan", which is how one suspects that they are getting a bit miffed. Oman reportedly rejecting their framework for Hormuz tolls may have contributed to that, in turn probably partly due to TRUMP's natural talent for extremely persuasive negotiation.

Back home, there has been a timely reminder that the majority of the local air force's latest fighter jet contingent will be kindly hosted in Arkansas, concurrent with an essay in Foreign Affairs by an LKYSPP don on how China is not really that popular - believe us - because balancing between Teams is seriously not easy in this day and age, with SM Lee doing his part in Kazakhstan (whose opportunistic straddling of Pax Silica and WAICO appears unresolved). As for WP leader Pritam Singh, he has displayed some fine political nous with a rendition of perennial Hokkien favourite Ai Piah Jia Eh Yia (i.e. Must 125 Then Can Win), after which his longstanding stance for an English competency test for new migrants may seem more palatable - if still biased against a certain Team Red giant...


[To be continued...]



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